by Joshua Am 6. June 2021

Feeling the call

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me.

My inner voice had become very loud and had long since found its way into my dreams. It was already too late to not listen to it, too loudly its contradictions were already echoing inside me. And yet I was doing very well with my life. Determined and successful, I had achieved many goals and built a respectable scaffolding of achievements - ready to climb the next rungs. Out of nowhere, this call arose and reminded me of an innocent dream that my mind had mindfully forgotten within myself.

Where did this voice come from that, as if from nowhere, put a question mark on my roles, identities and achievements and instead put a new exclamation mark inside me in the shimmering colours of the rainbow? Life had something in store for me that I was not prepared for. I watched helplessly as this wake-up call revealed something in me that had been well hidden inside until now. Something that had always been there and had eluded being to now being revealed through my life.

It was the timeless call of my soul that touched my heart at that time to initiate me deeper into the mysteries of life. To follow this call is truly a great adventure. I cannot promise you anything if you also want to follow it. I cannot tell you what will happen. I can’t even tell you where you will be tomorrow, if you will accept it. This call leads you beyond familiar structures into something new, something strange, to fathom the deep truth of your being, exposed to the unknown.

Are you really ready to leave your habits, concepts and expectations behind and learn to walk again on an unknown path? Are you ready to engage with the sensitivity and vulnerability of your being with responsibility? Are you ready to leave behind all the clothes of “I-am-this” and “I-am-not-this”? What about your ambition, your “I-want-to-achieve” and your “I-want-to-have”? Can you really trust your inner voice and your senses? Are you prepared for all these questions? Maybe it would be better to wait and see.

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me, jolting me out of my sleep again. This time I stayed awake. I couldn’t help it. I wanted to find out who I really am. On the threshold of life, I gathered all my courage and quietly said “Yes”. I breathed into the silence and felt a sinking feeling spread through my stomach, mingling with the doubts of uncertainty. Only when my soul embraced me with a warming smile I knew I was ready.

How much I love and appreciate today this inner voice that unveiled revealed life to me.

What are you waiting for?

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There is a space within us, where we can find deeper answers to our questions of life.