Blogstorages

Feeling the call

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me.

My inner voice had become very loud and had long since found its way into my dreams. It was already too late to not listen to it, too loudly its contradictions were already echoing inside me. And yet I was doing very well with my life. Determined and successful, I had achieved many goals and built a respectable scaffolding of achievements - ready to climb the next rungs. Out of nowhere, this call arose and reminded me of an innocent dream that my mind had mindfully forgotten within myself.

Where did this voice come from that, as if from nowhere, put a question mark on my roles, identities and achievements and instead put a new exclamation mark inside me in the shimmering colours of the rainbow? Life had something in store for me that I was not prepared for. I watched helplessly as this wake-up call revealed something in me that had been well hidden inside until now. Something that had always been there and had eluded being to now being revealed through my life.

It was the timeless call of my soul that touched my heart at that time to initiate me deeper into the mysteries of life. To follow this call is truly a great adventure. I cannot promise you anything if you also want to follow it. I cannot tell you what will happen. I can’t even tell you where you will be tomorrow, if you will accept it. This call leads you beyond familiar structures into something new, something strange, to fathom the deep truth of your being, exposed to the unknown.

Are you really ready to leave your habits, concepts and expectations behind and learn to walk again on an unknown path? Are you ready to engage with the sensitivity and vulnerability of your being with responsibility? Are you ready to leave behind all the clothes of “I-am-this” and “I-am-not-this”? What about your ambition, your “I-want-to-achieve” and your “I-want-to-have”? Can you really trust your inner voice and your senses? Are you prepared for all these questions? Maybe it would be better to wait and see.

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me, jolting me out of my sleep again. This time I stayed awake. I couldn’t help it. I wanted to find out who I really am. On the threshold of life, I gathered all my courage and quietly said “Yes”. I breathed into the silence and felt a sinking feeling spread through my stomach, mingling with the doubts of uncertainty. Only when my soul embraced me with a warming smile I knew I was ready.

How much I love and appreciate today this inner voice that unveiled revealed life to me.

What are you waiting for?

Feeling the call

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me.

My inner voice had become very loud and had long since found its way into my dreams. It was already too late to not listen to it, too loudly its contradictions were already echoing inside me. And yet I was doing very well with my life. Determined and successful, I had achieved many goals and built a respectable scaffolding of achievements - ready to climb the next rungs. Out of nowhere, this call arose and reminded me of an innocent dream that my mind had mindfully forgotten within myself.

Where did this voice come from that, as if from nowhere, put a question mark on my roles, identities and achievements and instead put a new exclamation mark inside me in the shimmering colours of the rainbow? Life had something in store for me that I was not prepared for. I watched helplessly as this wake-up call revealed something in me that had been well hidden inside until now. Something that had always been there and had eluded being to now being revealed through my life.

It was the timeless call of my soul that touched my heart at that time to initiate me deeper into the mysteries of life. To follow this call is truly a great adventure. I cannot promise you anything if you also want to follow it. I cannot tell you what will happen. I can’t even tell you where you will be tomorrow, if you will accept it. This call leads you beyond familiar structures into something new, something strange, to fathom the deep truth of your being, exposed to the unknown.

Are you really ready to leave your habits, concepts and expectations behind and learn to walk again on an unknown path? Are you ready to engage with the sensitivity and vulnerability of your being with responsibility? Are you ready to leave behind all the clothes of “I-am-this” and “I-am-not-this”? What about your ambition, your “I-want-to-achieve” and your “I-want-to-have”? Can you really trust your inner voice and your senses? Are you prepared for all these questions? Maybe it would be better to wait and see.

“What are you waiting for?” it whispered mysteriously from the silence inside me, jolting me out of my sleep again. This time I stayed awake. I couldn’t help it. I wanted to find out who I really am. On the threshold of life, I gathered all my courage and quietly said “Yes”. I breathed into the silence and felt a sinking feeling spread through my stomach, mingling with the doubts of uncertainty. Only when my soul embraced me with a warming smile I knew I was ready.

How much I love and appreciate today this inner voice that unveiled revealed life to me.

What are you waiting for?

Apprentice of life

Since I started listening to the teachings of my soul a few years ago, I have learned many thinks and probably unlearned even more. Isn’t life an eternal cycle of birth and death, being and non-being, construction and deconstruction? To live consciously in this cycle is to know that everything has its time.

Life reveals itself when I let myself breathe in its rhythm and have the necessary patience and maturity to give space to this breath of life. I have unlearned to meet life with resistance and that it is less about the non-being of wanting to achieve, but more about the being of becoming, which is inherent in the before, the now and the after. Like the earth, I constantly spin around myself and I have learned to be sheep and shepherd, guest and host, craftsman and architect, scientist and mystic at the same time. But just as the earth spins around the sun, so does my life spin around a centre outside me that shines its light into my life, illuminating it and making it appear as a work of art that I have not created myself.

I have learnt to sow seeds in fertile soil and let them grow with patience and love.

On my way, I got to know many tools of the soul, worked with them and experienced their meaning and use. As an apprentice, I learned to distinguish them according to purpose and quality until I was finally ready to look for my own tools, to recognise them and to value them appropriately. On the shamanic path, I found tools with natural signature that are highly precise to the subtle language of the soul. They serve healing and growth and they know about the sensitivity and vulnerability of life. They, like us, have a being of their own and want to be treated mindfully and with respect. Embraced and welcomed in their arms, I often listen to their stories, which blend harmoniously with the sounds of my soul. To know them by my side is a great gift of life that can only be appreciated with gratitude and love.

I have learned to breathe.

Equipped with appropriate tools, I learned that presence, awareness and letting be can open many spaces and that responsibility is an inevitable response to something that goes far beyond me. In many small steps I learned to really see myself, to accept and to lovingly embrace myself. I explore the vulnerability of my being through which I can tenderly recognise and understand myself as a human being. Patience, trust and devotion are always my faithful companions here. It is intimacy with myself, connection with myself and relationship with myself that enables me to live intimacy, love and relationship with others.

I have learned to listen into the silence.

I practise refining my senses to become more sensitive and alert, to be able to listen more deeply into life. The mysteries of the soul reveal themselves behind the curtains, just as the actual saying is hidden behind what is said. To listen into the silence is to detect the saying in the echo of what is said and to go into connection with the original. When I am truly in touch with my being, I experience an all-encompassing intimacy with life in which I am allowed to touch something deeply sacred. Often I then feel such a great joy that makes me weep happily in the arms of the divine Mother.

In all things I am Yours.

Apprentice of life

Since I started listening to the teachings of my soul a few years ago, I have learned many thinks and probably unlearned even more. Isn’t life an eternal cycle of birth and death, being and non-being, construction and deconstruction? To live consciously in this cycle is to know that everything has its time.

Life reveals itself when I let myself breathe in its rhythm and have the necessary patience and maturity to give space to this breath of life. I have unlearned to meet life with resistance and that it is less about the non-being of wanting to achieve, but more about the being of becoming, which is inherent in the before, the now and the after. Like the earth, I constantly spin around myself and I have learned to be sheep and shepherd, guest and host, craftsman and architect, scientist and mystic at the same time. But just as the earth spins around the sun, so does my life spin around a centre outside me that shines its light into my life, illuminating it and making it appear as a work of art that I have not created myself.

I have learnt to sow seeds in fertile soil and let them grow with patience and love.

On my way, I got to know many tools of the soul, worked with them and experienced their meaning and use. As an apprentice, I learned to distinguish them according to purpose and quality until I was finally ready to look for my own tools, to recognise them and to value them appropriately. On the shamanic path, I found tools with natural signature that are highly precise to the subtle language of the soul. They serve healing and growth and they know about the sensitivity and vulnerability of life. They, like us, have a being of their own and want to be treated mindfully and with respect. Embraced and welcomed in their arms, I often listen to their stories, which blend harmoniously with the sounds of my soul. To know them by my side is a great gift of life that can only be appreciated with gratitude and love.

I have learned to breathe.

Equipped with appropriate tools, I learned that presence, awareness and letting be can open many spaces and that responsibility is an inevitable response to something that goes far beyond me. In many small steps I learned to really see myself, to accept and to lovingly embrace myself. I explore the vulnerability of my being through which I can tenderly recognise and understand myself as a human being. Patience, trust and devotion are always my faithful companions here. It is intimacy with myself, connection with myself and relationship with myself that enables me to live intimacy, love and relationship with others.

I have learned to listen into the silence.

I practise refining my senses to become more sensitive and alert, to be able to listen more deeply into life. The mysteries of the soul reveal themselves behind the curtains, just as the actual saying is hidden behind what is said. To listen into the silence is to detect the saying in the echo of what is said and to go into connection with the original. When I am truly in touch with my being, I experience an all-encompassing intimacy with life in which I am allowed to touch something deeply sacred. Often I then feel such a great joy that makes me weep happily in the arms of the divine Mother.

In all things I am Yours.

Living with contradictions

What happens when we experience contradictions in our perceptions, attitudes, needs, assumptions or behaviour? Leon Festinger describes in his theory of cognitive dissonance how we resolve unpleasant contradictions.

In our everyday life we often experience situations where a conflict arises between our attitudes and our behaviour. We then experience an uncomfortable feeling that can even lead us to a lasting change of our attitudes and our behaviour. To experience consistency in a world full of contradictions, we often use irrational justifications and self-manipulations.

Leon Festinger1 (1957) investigated this fact when he observed a cult whose followers believed that the earth would be destroyed by a flood. When the earth was then surprisingly not destroyed after all, a contradiction arose between their beliefs and reality. The sincere followers now resolved the contradiction by believing that the earth was spared because of their faithful behaviour. In another case, the non-occurrence of the end of the world was blamed on an error in the calculation of the date.

How such justifications and attitude changes occur even in more ordinary situations is explained by the theory of cognitive dissonance2. The best-known example of this are smokers who know that smoking can cause cancer. The desire to smoke and the knowledge that smoking can lead to illness and a shorter life creates cognitive dissonance. I’m sure you’ve heard many interesting reasons why smoking is still a great thing

However, there are very specific moments when we all experience cognitive dissonance.

What causes cognitive dissonance?

Essentially, there are three options:

  • Acting according to social conventions: When we publicly feel compelled to act differently than we actually want to, an inner contradiction arises. To resolve it, we are often willing to change our attitude towards the behaviour. We then find a behaviour that we previously rejected to be appropriate.
  • Making decisions: Whenever we have to make a choice, we experience a dissonance between our choice and the thought of having made a wrong choice. Usually, we then change our attitudes so that we make our choice something better than it was before.
  • High effort: When we have already invested a lot to achieve something, we get into an inner conflict whether to stop or to continue - we have to justify the effort we have made so far. To justify the previous effort, we then often adjust the value of the goal upwards.

It should be noted that all these changes in attitude usually happen unconsciously. However, by knowing this theory, you can increase your sensitivity to it and observe it in your life.

How can dissonance be reduced?

In his theory, Festinger has shown three ways in which we can reduce cognitive dissonance:

  • We change one or more attitudes or aspects of our behaviour.
  • We diminish the importance of our attitudes or behaviour.
  • We add new attitudes.

We cannot always change our behaviour to reduce dissonance. In other cases, it is obvious that we then have to change something in our attitudes to reduce dissonance. This can even have lasting long-term consequences.

In positive cases, studies have shown that prejudices can be reduced or addictions can be reduced. However, attitude changes can also cause disadvantages. This is particularly relevant when the dissonance arises because someone questions our self-concept or we lie to ourselves to justify our behaviour.

Paying attention to ourselves helps to become self-aware and to discover contradictions between our attitude and our behaviour. With awareness, we can then do our best to live in harmony with our subjective truth. Although this may even lead to more uncomfortable feelings in the short term, in the long term it is the only way to live truthfully.

Observe yourself in the next time and experience how you deal with contradictions in your experience.


  1. Festinger, L. (1957). A theory of cognitive dissonance. Stanford. ↩︎

  2. Aronson, E., Wilson, T. D., Akert, R. M., & Sommers, S. (2016). Social psychogy (9th ed.). Boston: Pearson. ↩︎

There is a space within us, where we can find deeper answers to our questions of life.